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Sagada Igorot

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What if Pope Francis Was a Filipino?

The white smoke coming from the chimney of Sistine Chapel in Vatican signified that a new Pope was already chosen by the cardinals there. The lucky guy is Jorge Mario Bergoglio who later styled himself as Pope Francis.

Pope Francis is now the head of Catholics around the world. He is an Argentine- making Obama call him “the first Pope from the Americas. 

What if he was Filipino?

1.    Pope Francis would call himself “Pope Kiko”! Gays would start addressing him “Papa Kikay”.

2.    Pope Francis would get a one-hour interview on TV Patrol World with Korina Sanchez.

3.    Pope Francis would be offered a hosting gig by GMA 7's Eat Bulaga. Then ABS-CBN would counter-offer with an acting project for Maalaala Mo Kaya featuring his own life story.

4.    Pope Francis would have met President Benigno S. Aquino for a burger break, along with Bam Aquino.

5.    Pope Francis would talk against same-sex marriage and the Reproductive Health Law.

6.    All our Moslem brothers in Mindanao would be forgotten. Even their schools would be mandated to erect a statue of of the new Pope.

7.    The Philippines would become more famous for spending taxpayers’ money to build a gigantic cross for Guinness Book of World Records title.

8.    More children would be named after him- including priests’ kids in orphanages.

9.    Pope Francis would not be concerned about the Falkland Islands dispute. Instead, he would intervene in the Philippines-Malaysia war over Sabah or North Borneo.

10. Pope Francis would be called “Kiko, ang Kataas-taasang Santo Papa”.

A Marketing Communications specialist on weekdays and a life wanderer on weekends, Christian Lizardo Aligo enjoys working in the real estate industry. For more info, email him at [email protected]


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