I honestly do not remember the last time I celebrated my birthday. What I know is that I have reached the age when birthdays are mere reminders that we need to get up every morning to pay our bills.

When I was in my elementary days, my father never failed to let me get anything from Uncle Dongail’s Store to cook for my birthday. Instantly, I would get ingredients for macaroni salad.

After college, my cousin Marianne, who also celebrates her birthday this month, lets me celebrate with her. The last time, she cooked enough food for us cousins to feast on at their rented apartment near Easter School.

I am from a typical Igorot household. My parents and siblings do not give gifts during birthdays. We even skip birthday greetings and everything is just fine. Our household knows less about birthdays although it never failed to give us sumptuous food and other type of support a child needs.

This year’s birthday, I would love to believe it was a regular day. I hate to hear my colleagues sing that fancy birthday song.





It sucks. What’s running on my mind is the question whether or not I am leading a good life that is on track. Must it be some sort of quarter life crisis?

It’s my third year into the real estate industry. How about mass media or teaching? It’s my fourth year into my stay here in Metro Manila. How about my home Cordillera or abroad?

Questions. Questions.

Two days after my birthday, I went up to Baguio for our family reunion. We were all happy catching up. The next day, I went down to La Union for the christening of my batch mate’s son. And the next day, I had to rush to work- oh life!

My boss just finished evaluating my performance and I can feel the emptiness in me. I am approaching my 30's and I don’t know if I did a good job for my life.

I thought last year was my best year and as I see what happened in the past six months this year, I see nothing but work-sleep-work routine (to add salt to the injury, it is quite an irony that my team has experienced a huge struggle in a quarter despite those overs). I must be missing a huge portion of myself, of the real world I dreamed of.

If you ask me about my birthday wish, I have only one thing on my mind. And that is for my brother Marlon to get well. He suffered from hemorrhagic stroke and stayed lying in the hospital for less than two months. Now he is on his recovery period, staying in a place our cousin has extended to us.

As to my wish for myself, I think I am okay with what I have for now. God took my Dad last year, so I guess I now taste the bitter truth that everything good cannot come at once.

I guess I have the remaining six months to confide with 2017 for a better year. Ready get set go!